I Just Cancelled Everything

I just cancelled 95% of my meetings and calls for the month of May. And I've been shocked by the response.

As context, I'm supporting my teenage son through a very difficult moment. 

[Let's be honest, a few very difficult years.]

In this time, it's been extremely stressful to split my focus between work and caregiver mode. 

I love my career, and I resist (and get angry) when I can't focus on it to my fullest capacity.

And yet, life has been showing me that my focus needs to be on my family, on being Mom. And in order to do that, I've had to become incredibly discerning about where my time, attention and efforts go.

Nowhere has this tension been more explicit than on my calendar. 

Every day I've been waking up with my stress spiked – balancing making meals, managing emotions, walking the dog, calling about healthcare appointments... while also somehow needing to be presentable (and on time!) for a podcast interview, networking call, or other event. The logistics – and the mental context switching – have just been nuts.

At my breaking point a few days ago, I sat in the tub and enjoyed some silence. Out of nowhere, the words rang in my head:

"It's just work."

I felt my shoulders soften and my exhales grow deep. It's just work. And I immediately knew what I had to do.

The part that's surprised me – as I've cancelled meetings, with apologies, and received replies – has been how many people have not just been understanding... 

They have offered to help. Wishing me good luck and sharing their own difficult and private family stories. Offering to trade emails, to listen, and share support.

No one was mad. No one felt I'd wasted their time. Everyone understood.

Since cancelling, my exhales have deepened even more. Not just because of the white space on my calendar. But because I felt deeply seen and supported. Because I'm not alone. 

And neither are you. 

Try This Out 

If you're going through a challenging time, the greatest gift you can give yourself, and others, is being vulnerable and honest about where you are and what matters in this season of your life. 

You'll be surprised by the deep support you receive, and you'll make it ok for others to do the same, too.

Today, take a moment to reflect on these questions:

• Where in my life do I feel tension, conflict, or overwhelm? 

• What’s really going on here? If I could give this “tension” a name or a title, what would I call it?

• How do I experience this tension – in my thoughts, my heart, my body and my spirit? How does it impact me?

• What’s one small step I can take to release this tension, even just by 1%?

For this last question, you might find that an answer doesn’t immediately reveal itself. That’s ok. Keep the question close and see what comes to you. Meditate on it. Hold it in your mind as you take a walk. Allow your thoughts to flow. 

Your next step will make itself known, just like mine did.

What To Do Next

One of the tools that’s helped me listen for my own answers has been strengthening my connection with my intuition.

And “pulling cards,” in my opinion, is one of the most accessible ways to practice that connection.

As I’ve started to share and sell The Little Deck of Sweet Reflections, I’ve received a number of questions about what it means to pull a card. I LOVE this question because I remember my own trepidation when I first started.

The great news? There is no right – or wrong – way to use a card deck. 

Our brains are Meaning Making Machines. Every day, without even realizing it, your brain is sense-making, translating, decoding, and storytelling. 

When you select a card – whether you shuffle or cut the deck, or just pull a card from the center – your brain will immediately get to work on understanding what that message means for you.

Your job? To trust the meaning that comes through.

To see how that word or phrase, or the imagery, speaks to you. How it shows up that day as a theme. Or even how it might guide you to take action in a certain way.

If you’re ready to practice, check out my new deck. It’s an accessible, beautiful companion for you as you strengthen your connection with your intuition, and take meaningful action in your career and life.

Onward,